It’s November 11^th, and I have already given up on no shave November.  I would like to tell you that I did it because my handlebar moustache was getting in the way when I would try to tie my shoes or something, but let’s just say that I’m not yet the man that I hope to be one day.

I’ve been trying to think of ways for people like me to support Movember other than growing a moustache. I think that I’ve come up with a few good ideas.

Grow out your nails

Undoubtedly the second greatest display of masculinity to growing a moustache.

Grow out the hair on your head

I really only trust my mom to cut my hair, so I will be doing this for the rest of the semester, whether I like it or not.

Pour a bucket of ice water on your head

I know that this is a totally random way to raise awareness for a disease, but I really think that it could catch on.

Drink milk

It’s a good way to fake having a moustache, and again, it’s random, but I think that this could take off on its own.

Do an “-athon”

Telethon, walkathon, readathon, or whatever you want—just do something and do if for a long time in the name of helping people.

Donate money at us.movember.com

Let’s not forget what this is actually all about.

“If you just give me the sticker I will leave right now.”  -Everyone who rocked the vote today

“D-A-N-N-E-L.  Is that a typo or does he actually spell his name that way?”  -Anyone who read their ballot

“Is there a polling place that I can go to with longer lines?”  -No one

“Can I just get a gd red check!” -Anyone who registered in City Hall

“I don’t like labels”  -Member of the Working Families Party

“I’m gonna go try to get an iPhone 6.”  -Person that didn’t realize how much they like waiting in lines until today

Halloweek is well underway, but for some reason people aren’t walking around in full costume!  I’m here to change that with these helpful last minute costume ideas. *

James Franco

-Just to piss off the people that thought this was such a clever idea.

Betty Who and Macklemore

-You’ve already got the haircut, so just be Betty one night and Macklemore the other (all you need is a little bit of red hair dye).

Teletubbies

-I know it’s already been done, but on the plus side you have a great excuse to join in on any group hug that you want. And “teletubbies” is fun to say.

Lizzy McGuire

-Look out though; Aaron Carter might come to town early if you really pull this costume off.

Centaur

-I just think that this would be a really cool costume.

*It goes without saying that you can make these suggestions into the “sexy” version of the costume.

It’s not hard to get me to watch a movie that is executive produced by Nick Cannon, nor is it hard to get me to watch a movie sequel that comes out twelve years after the original and goes straight to television.  That’s why I will be watching Drumline: A New Beat tonight at 10pm on VH1.

The sequel will feature many real marching band musicians because according to the director, “We didn’t have the prep time that they had on the first one and it had to be people that knew what they were doing.”  This totally makes sense because no one has ever been able to fake talent on camera with only twelve years of prep time.

If you don’t watch tonight, we will have beef.  I’m talking real beef, not the kind of beef that we can overcome because of our mutual love of marching bands.  I’ll be so angry that I might even drum on your drum a little bit…don’t push me.

You can watch with me in my room or you can go to the simulcast in SSS.

You probably remember Lil’ Romeo from his television show, The Romeo Show.  Percy Miller Jr., as he is known at the hospital where he was born, has done a lot more than just create one of the greatest intro songs ever and hang out in front of the camera.

Romeo played varsity basketball for four years at USC.  USC can recruit from all across the country, so it makes sense that they would choose someone with “Lil’” in their name to play on their basketball team.

Lil’ Romeo has also dipped his toes into the fashion design world.  In college, Romeo created a label called, “College Boyys”.  Romeo wanted to tell people, “It’s actually cool to be smart.”  Yeah, Lil’ Romeo, nothing says, “I’m smart” like spelling boys with two y’s.  Percy is currently working on a new line called “ROME Everything”.  Apparently, ROAMING the quad at school was not enough, now he’s RO(A)MING everything.  Once again Romeo is telling fans of spelling to shove it where the sun don’t shine.

I’m going to check if College Boyys is on Amazon yet, deuces.

“Can’t you just tell your friends that you went to their concert.”

-Every parent that went to an a cappella concert

“This wenzel is making me happier than you ever have.”

-Father to mother

“I’m only going to Toad’s if it’s free.”

-Parent who knows what’s up

“I wish college was like this back when I was a student.”

-Every person over the age of 28

“I brought you a six-pack.  Don’t tell your mother.”

-The cool dad

“I brought you some weed.  Don’t tell your mother.”

-The cool dad from Colorado

North Korean leader, Kim Jong Un, has not been seen in public since early September.  Many experts believe that he has been deposed and that his sister, Kim Yo-jung, may have taken over control. I present to you a number of possible locations where Kim Jong Un could be hiding.

Dennis Rodman’s House

You’re never too old for a sleep over.  If I had to guess, I would say that Rodman and Un are sitting on a couch, wearing snuggies, and watching reruns of Degrassi at this very moment.

Nickelback Concert

Fun fact about KJU: He played the triangle in Nickelback until he and Chad Kroeger had a falling out over their mutual love of Avril Lavigne.

Moad’s

Monday is the most underrated night to go to Toad’s. North Korean dictators love penny drinks.

The balcony of SSS

He read great reviews of Cold War on OCI and had to see what all the fuss was about.

North Korea

Let’s be honest, Big Foot and the Loch Ness Monster could be playing double-dutch on the streets of Pyongyang, and no one in America would have any idea.

It seems like it’s been ages since Derek Jeter said goodbye to baseball forever.  The Bullblog reached out to the cap’n to see what he has been up to since retiring.  DJ was nice enough to send us a copy of the diary that he has been keeping since his last game.  Read away:

Last Game:  After the game I ate some orange slices but my lips started to hurt so I stopped.  I cried a little bit on the way home but it was fine because I just told everyone that it was because I had citrus in my eye.  I got home and watched that Gatorade commercial that I made.  I started to cry again but no one was around so I just let the tears flow.

Day 1:  I taste-tested every flavor of girl scout cookie.  I really didn’t understand what all the fuss over thin mints was about until my dad gave me a frozen one.  OMG, you guys have gotta try that.  Later I played foursquare, but then I crashed from all of the sugar.

Day 2:  I woke up and ate a stack of eggos, just like mama used to make ‘em.  Afterwards I snuck to the freezer and ate a few frozen ones.  Life tastes better when you’re naughty.  Later I watched an ESPN documentary about myself.  Then I ate a few more frozen eggos.

Day 3:  I spent like thirty hours on www.buzzfeed.com, this cool website my friend showed me.  After that I watched the Sixth Sense…totally did NOT see that ending coming!!!

Today:  I barely got any sleep last night after the whirlwind day I had yesterday! Today I played backyard baseball for a while.  I’m really starting to miss the game.  Do you guys think it would be weird if I came back?

This week’s Where in the world is… follows Nicolas Cage.  While Cage is not completely out of the spotlight, he is the subject of this weeks post because he does not get nearly the media attention that he deserves.

I figured the reason that the Cage has been out of the spotlight was that he was in the slammer doing time for stealing national treasures and the like.  I could not be more wrong.  Nicky is very much on the loose.

It has been a big year for the Rusty Cage (as he is known in the biz) in terms of adventure.  Idris Alba recently revealed that while the two were filming a movie together, Cage snuck up to the real Dracula’s castle and slept in its ruins.  When I write that it doesn’t actually seem that strange after all.  Do you Nicky, don’t let the haters hold you back!

The year got better this summer when the Iron Cage became an abuelo (grandpa, to the layman).  Something tells me that ole Grampy Nicolas is going to steal this kids heart like it’s the Declaration of Independence.

Cage fans should get excited for his return to the silver screen in upcoming films such as Natty Treasure 3, The Croods 2, and thousands of others.

Credit: celebuzz.com

I can’t say that I’m too familiar with the show but I would imagine that it’s about two “true detectives” who like to solve crimes and crash weddings/fight superheroes on the side.  Maybe it’s about SWAT team members who play on competing dodge ball teams.  Your guess is as good as mine.

This casting decision clearly shows that HBO is trying to attract fans of the early 2000s to the show.  So fire up your dialup Internet and log onto www.hbogo.com to see all of the action that you missed in the first season.