Now, there’s a question.

Some people like it. Some people don’t like it. Some people are waiting to download it.

My thoughts? It’s like having a Tamagotchi all over again. Same layout. Same features. The only different is that I don’t have to feed my iPhone.

Also, don’t complain about it, because there’s literally nothing to be done.

This weekend is Parent’s Weekend, as Yale hosts our creators for a few days of fun.  Having your family around can be fun, but only if you do it right. I can’t tell you how to spend your family time, but I can tell you how not to spend it.

Don’t eat in the dining halls, because if you do then your parents will see that the food is healthy and not that bad and then they’ll give you less money. Instead, have them take you to supper somewhere!

Don’t say hello to most of your friends, because most of your friends are embarrassing.

Don’t go out with your parents. It’s never actually fun in practice.

Don’t get into meaningless fights with your Dad. It’s just not worth it! You guys love each other, so try to remember that.

Don’t go to Sushi on Chapel, because you might get violently ill.

If you have a sibling at Yale, don’t make your parents choose which one they love more.

Finally, don’t get your hopes up because Parent’s Weekend can be lame.

There’s just something about her.

People were filtering in and out of the Study’s lobby, but all eyes were on Rebecca Delman SY ’16.

Becca loves dogs, football and dark chocolate, her favorite Instagram filter is “Mayfair,” but behind those hazel eyes is a stern, serious lady.

“I like a guy with good manners,” she told me, “and I like when guys are always honest about their feelings.” After that, I was on my best behavior. You can’t get anything by this gal.

Perhaps it’s the English tradition that gives her that no-nonsense attitude: born in Great Britain, Becca moved to Manhasset, Long Island, when she was just a wee lass.

But don’t get the wrong idea, because Becca does, on occasion, let her hair down. She’s a sucker for the Bachelor and Bachelorette, and she can be quite the jokester:  “In elementary school, whenever we had a substitute teacher I put on a fake accent and we all pretended I was British.” What a rascal!

Oh, and she likes giving her Dad a hard time, too. He’s a die-hard Giants fan, but Becca’s favorite team is the Jets. “This is our year. I’ve got a feeling.”

At Yale, Rebecca works for YTV, and is in a sorority. Admittedly, she’s “not a sorority girl,” but she likes that Theta is “low key and fun.”

She’s also on the Public Relations and Marketing Committee for Camp Kesem, an organization that runs camps to support the loved-ones and family members of those with cancer.

Seems like Becca’s got it all figured out, but does she? Pretty much, yes, but don’t be discouraged, because she currently has no man in her life. I can’t imagine that will be true for much longer.

Look for Becca around campus and say hello! She’s very friendly. Oh, and she normally wears glasses, but don’t be fooled if you see her without them, as she’s contemplating the switch to contacts.

Ty Warner, the creator and father of Beanie Babies, is guilty.

Warner will pay a $53.1 million fine to the government for tax evasion after hiding his loot in offshore bank accounts. With that money, the government could (and should) buy 10.6 million Beanie Babies. It’s a good investment — those are going to be worth a lot of money one day, as will Pokemon cards.

Initially, I was amazed that Beanie Babies could have made someone a multi-millionaire. Then, I remembered how awesome they are and how badly I wanted them. Seeing as I was only an amateur collector and still there are about 150 of them in my room at home, and no less than 200 in my sister’s room, I’m no longer surprised that Ty Warner is loaded.

I am surprised, however, that he didn’t hide his money inside of his inevitably gigantic collection of Beanie Babies. I bet his kids have all the coolest limited edition Beanies. Like the one that’s Union Jack themed!

I’m happy that Ty is being brought to justice, but I’m quite concerned for the fate of Beanie Baby production. I always imagined that I’d be able to buy my kids Beanie Babies – how dare the IRS take that away from me.

FREE TY!

The soon-to-be-irrelevant actor tweeted that “School is the Tool to Brainwash The Youth,” and that “Education is Rebellion.” If you are confused as to what he means, then you’ve been in school too long and you are brainwashed and you are in rebellion.

Most notably Jaden said, “If Everybody In The World Dropped Out of School We Would Have A Much More Intelligent Society.” It is speculated that his inappropriate use of capital letters is the direct result of missing a lot of school to attend the Kid’s Choice Awards.

Jaden is so committed to his vision for a world without school that this will be the subject of his next film: Karate Kid IV: Teacher Hunt.

Smith’s comments may create tension between himself and Asher Roth, a fellow rapper who holds sharply contrasting views on the subject of education.

Credit: Zip-off shorts

“Is this heat wave going to continue? Is it going to be hot again tomorrow? Or should I be prepared for more a more temperate atmosphere? Ugh! What do I wear?!”

You’ve been there. It’s frustrating to have no idea what a day might end up being like and stressful not to know what you should wear! That’s why zip-offs are so cool. They keep you cool, they keep you warm and they make you look cool while making you look hot! There should be zip-off options for every other type of clothing.

D: Air-conditioned spaces

Before you think I’m stupid, let me just tell you that I love AC. But, there are problems that accompany a freezing cold room amidst a humid, horrible and sweaty day. First of all, the sweat from your shirt consolidates around the nipple and teet area when you first enter a cold room. Then, the sweat on your face pools around your upper lip. Then, you are just so cold that you want to step outside for a minute to warm up! This is no way to live, although it is much better than not having AC at all.

Fail: The overdue stop-and-chat

It’s too late for “how was your summer.” When you see a friend on the street and you two have not yet had a chance to do a catch-up sesh, it’s so hard to figure out how your relationship is going to progress! Should you resign yourself to the fact that you guys aren’t that close, or should you renew your commitment? The move, in my opinion, is to make a tentative date to catch up later. Next Thursday? Let’s do lunch this week, yeah? Are you going out tomorrow? Will I see you at SigEp’s “Turn’t?” Coffee on Sunday? Find a way to make it work. Impossible is nothing.

“Do you like it?” Faisal Kawar, SY ’14, asked me as he showed me his newest painting.

I liked it. I liked it a lot.

“I like to say Picasso wasn’t the best when he started either,” he said.

Although he’s a painting novice, Faisal is experienced in other art forms.

He’s got a three-course signature meal, but he only makes it for the luckiest of ladies.

“You must, must start with my tuna tartar. Or beef carpaccio depending on who I’m cooking for,”  he said.  Then, he’ll serve you a wonderfully spicy lamb chop. The third course, served for its reputation as an afrodesiac, will be oysters.

He’s a chef, a painter and an avid Risk player. He loves Risk, because, as he explained, “You gotta risk it for the biscuit.”

What can’t this man do? Tell you what kind of cologne he wears, that’s what.

Also, Style is very important to Faisal. Unless he’s playing basketball, you’ll probably find Faisal wandering around campus sporting a nifty blazer, because he loves wearing blazers. Blazers are his favorite.

At Yale, Faisal has made a name for himself as the Michael Jordan of students from Jordan: he organized a program to help Yale students get internships in the Middle East. He also plays club basketball and, as a member of Sigma Alpha Epsilon and his current senior society, Faisal is quite the social butterfly. But, he doesn’t need any of that to have fun: “You put me in a room with nothing to do, and I’ll make it fun,” he says.

To his credit, we were sitting in a room with nothing to do and I had a fantastic time.

I was impressed with his many talents and couldn’t help but wonder what the future has in store for this man. The answer: a lot.

“Where do you see yourself in five years?” I asked him.

“Five years? So, that’s four years out of college… I guess probably retired on a beach somewhere,” he told me.

As you can see, Faisal straddles the line between a retired old man and a young, ambitious whipper-snapper. He described himself in similar terms: “I am a sloth in a tiger’s body.”

That’s a very, very lucky tiger if you ask me.

Global Zero just found its newest, most dangerous enemy: Dennis Rodman.

Rodman, the owner of Bad Boy Vodka and former NBA star, is visiting North Korea to spend some alone-time with Kim Jung Un.

Although no one ever thought otherwise, Rodman insists he’s “not a diplomat.” Instead, he’s sending a message to Americans: “it’s not a bad thing to go to North Korea, and have a good time and meet new people.”

In fairness, that’s a fantastic point.

Saving the world one dude at a time, perhaps Kim Jung Un isn’t that bad after all.

You might be wondering what, if anything, North Korea’s leader and Dennis have in common. Surprisingly, they are quite similar: they’re into weird shit, they’re both above 6’ 5’’ tall, and they both have been to North Korea.

When asked about Rodman’s visit, Kim Jung Un said something in Korean, which Rodman interpreted as a warm welcome.

If all goes well, Rodman may be asked to visit Syria to broker a peace agreement with the Assad regime. Fingers crossed!

When you ask someone how their summer was, they make it sound impressive. I do it. You do it. We all scream for ice cream. An internship for a new tech start up sounds UNREAL, but was it? Here’s how to know what someone actually did over the summer.

Think Tank = Bathroom breaks.

Auction House = Considering everything to be art

Hedge Fund = Excel

Studying at LSE = Pub rat

Newspaper = Using spellcheck

Google = Playing with toys

Consulting = Getting a work phone

Non-profit = Taking some “me” time

NGO = Eat, pray, love

Start-up = Casual Fridays

You absolutely, literally, 100 percent need to get into that seminar. Your schedule would be perfect this semester — no class until 1:00 on Mondays! On Fridays you’d be even freer than a bird!

So what are you going to do about it? Cross your fingers? Pray? Show up on time? Ha.

No, you need to get ruthless and you need to do it fast. Try any of the following:

1) Give the professor a blank check. Pay to the order of “The Coolest Professor Ever.”

2) Bug the professor’s office and threaten to expose what he/she really thinks of Edmund Burke.

3) Place an apple on the professor’s desk, except instead of an apple you can put a really expensive gift.

4) Tell the professor that one of your peers has a contagious weight-gaining disease.

5) Dress well and look professional.

6) Make up a really sad lie so the professor feels bad for you.

7) Nice guys finish last, so be mean.

8) Ask the YDN to cover your attempt to get into this seminar. All press is good press.

9) Treat others how you would want to be treated.