I’ve been trying to install Yale VPN (virtual private shit-work) for two and a half years.

The first time I tried, I got frustrated. The second time, I was sort of impressed. The third time, I felt embarrassed. The fourth time, I got mad and, after trying for the fifth time just moments ago, I feel hurt.

Why is VPN so impossible? Why, after all these years, doesn’t it care about how I feel?  What the heck is Cisco AnyConnect? It should be called Cisco NoConnect if you ask me!

On a lighter note, Tarry Lodge (also known as Box 64) is open and it looks nice in there.

I went to New York City this weekend to attend the People’s Climate March — the largest climate change march in history. Over 300,000 people were there, and it was un-fracking-real.

I expected to be overwhelmed with a sense of togetherness and urgency. I certainly felt that, but I was most shocked by the home-made, anti-everything signage I saw every which way I looked. The picture above is one example.

Hundreds of signs proudly raised said, “End capitalism.” A few others read, “Marxists for science.” A whole group spanning a city block held signs that called upon us all to “ban corporations.” My personal favorite sign, which was twenty feet long and thirty feet high, had written in red letters on a black canvas the words “SHUT THEM ALL DOWN.”

I left the march ready to shut them all down. I’ve shut down everything I can since sunday afternoon. We really need to shut the frack up and start shutting the frack down. The system is fracked and the moment is now.

Celebrity chef Mario Batali (aka the only real man left in the culinary arts) is opening a pizzeria in our very own Elm City.

Sandwiched between Connecticut’s two most prominent spiritual havens, St. Thomas Moore and Box 63, Tarry Lodge will be a lively addition to the Park Street milieu.

It’s not clear when Tarry Lodge will be open for business, but when it does there will finally be a pizza place in New Haven!

The real question on my mind, however, is what abbreviation we will all adopt for Tarry Lodge. Here are some suggestions:

The Lodge, Batali’s Sweat Den, TL, Tarry L, Pizza Next to Box, Tarry’s, Larry Todge, Batali’s Slice of Heaven, Box 64, Tomatillo, Batali’s Baby Cousin’s House.

Ever think Toad’s isn’t where you’re going to meet your husband? Ever think Box isn’t where you’re going to meet your wife? Ever think Bass isn’t where you’re going to meet your husband? Ever think Maison Mathis isn’t where you’re going to meet your maker?

Don’t worry, Friendsy is launching at Yale. Its like Match.com knew we were coming, only this isn’t Match.com, it’s Friendsy! Its an app that puts you in touch with new friends, and maybe more!

Yale ITS sent out an email today at 4:15pm. The first line read: “malicious websites have recently begun exploiting a new unpatched vulnerability in all versions of Internet Explorer (IE).”

If you’re still using Internet Explorer, then you’ve already been fully exploited. You should sign off America Online Instant Messenger, close your MySpace, and change your Friendster password ASAP.

Ja Rule will be performing at Spring Fling on Saturday!

Booking Ja was a little tricky, because he’s not always there when you call. But, not to worry, because he’s always on time.

Reportedly, Diplo will fill in for Ashanti, her hips and her thighs.

Today is Easter Sunday and it’s also 4/20: the perfect storm for an Egg Hunt.

Duuuude. That egg is crazy purple! How do I open it? Oh shit! There’s chocolate in here. Woah. This chocolate is good. Where are the other eggs?

Check this egg out dude! It’s so pink I can’t deal. This one has sour patch inside!

Yo let’s go watch Sailor Moon that show is so tight.

Steer clear! These babies are hungry for blood. Petting never hurt so good.

Today, astronomers announced their discovery of Kepler 186f, a planet orbiting within the “goldilocks” zone (not too hot, not too cold, just right), lying 500 light-years away and now known as “Earth’s cousin.”

I’m pumped about this. I love Earth’s cousin.

In case there is life on this planet, shouldn’t we give it a better name? All the planets close to us have sick names, why is this one called Kepler 186f? I think it should be called either El Niño, Robin Thicke, Gosling, or America. Any of those will do!

As you may have heard, “seder” means “order,” and tonight is the first night of passover! I got to sit down with one of the Four Sons of Passover, the fourth son himself, the one, the only, the Child Who Doesn’t Know Enough to Ask a Question. Spoiler alert: he does know enough.

JS: “Hey! Ready for tonight?”

4s: “Are you ready?”

JS: “Nope, still scouting out places to hide Afikomen. Any suggestions?”

4s: “I don’t know, do I have any suggestions?”

JS: “Classic! What is your favorite passover tradition?”

4s: “You think you’re the only one in Charlestown with a gun?”

JS: “No, I know better. What do you think about Hillary Clinton running for president in 2016?”

4s: “Turn down for what?”