“This weather is orgasmic!”

—Williamson Hall

“It feels weird wearing shorts, and there are still piles of snow hanging around.”

—Walter Library

Girl: “I don’t get how anyone can dislike spring.”

Guy: “Allergies?”

Girl: “No. I get shirtless guys running outside, and you get the return of cleavage and sundresses. Everyone wins.”

—Ruttan Hall

Waitress: “This single spot is all yours.”

Guy: “Hell yeah! I guess there are benefits to waking up on the sidewalk!”

—Al’s Breakfast

Girl: “What even IS Spring Jam?”

—Dinkytown McDonald’s

“You know it’s only 10:24. The night is still young bitches, I just wanna go streaking.”

—Coffman Union

“Where do all the flies go during winter? They must swim across the ocean or something.”

—Unknown

Girl: “I like your shirt.”

Guy 1: “I like YOUR shirt.”

Guy 2: “You only liked her shirt because her boobs were in it.”

—Centennial Hall

“I’m just trying to get laid. Not a big deal.”

—Spring Jam concert

Girl on the phone: “But that’s unhealthy! You have to talk about sex! That’s what — that’s what makes pedophiles!”

—Washington Avenue Bridge

“You guys are so cute, cheating on homework together.”

—Walter Library

Professor: “Time to wear your bikini to school!”

—Humphrey School of Public Affairs

“Did I ever tell you about the time when I got so high that Journey popped out of my iPod and started singing to me?”

—Folwell Hall