No offense, Paul Giammatti and Eli Whitney, you’re both pretty accomplished. And sure, you deserve your “New Haven Notable” designation. But the fact that Lupita Nyong’o does not have hew a banner with her face on it yet? Now, that’s injustice. Not only did she give one of the best performances of this year in “12 Years a Slave,” but she is also slated to star alongside Liam Neeson in an upcoming movie “Non-Stop.” If it is anything like “Taken,” or “Taken 2,” you know it is going to be pretty bo$$.

I am not sure who decides who become one of these “notables,” (Toni Harp, is it you?!) but to move the process along a little faster, I have volunteered to write up the totally objective and factual blurb on Miss Nyong’o.

Born in Kenya in 1983, Lupita Nyong’o came to New Haven to study at the Yale School of Drama and graduated in the Class of 2012. To put that in perspective, that means everyone–except for the frosh and Maison Mathis–may have overlapped with Lupita at some point in their Yale career. She currently ranks highly in the School of Drama Hall of Fame, second only to Meryl Streep because it’s Meryl fucking Streep and duh (side-note: Meryl’s New Haven Notable hangs above Miya’s).

While at Yale, Lupita performed in a variety of student productions, including Uncle Vanya, The Taming of the Shrew, and–most notably–the freshman orientation show, “Kaleidoscope.” Lupita was known to frequent Atticus because she’s soo the Atticus type and would occasionally hit Alpha Delta for her post-show Wenzel–no ranch sauce, extra spicyyy.

If she wins the Oscars, she will be sure to thank David Brooks for teaching her the meaning of “humility,” and Allison Williams for failing to be her. This achievement would mark the biggest honor she has received since making it onto Rumpus’ 50 Most her senior year at school. Rumor has it that Nyong’o will be returning to perform at Toad’s in a one-woman show entitled, “12 Years a Rave.” 

Stay posted for future New Haven Notable suggestions.