Bullying can occur anywhere, any place and with any kinds of people. Courtesy of ABCNews.go.com
Ever since I was little, I’ve always heard the same phrase, “Treat others like you want to be treated.”
No matter the age, it somehow would be brought up, whether in conversation with a friend, a school assembly or working with campers or students.
The source of the reason for it being brought up was for bullying.
At a young age we are taught that bullying is wrong and that we shouldn’t do it. Yet, it happens everywhere and we have grown up with being bullied or doing the bullying.
Bullying can range from vocal attacks like name calling and spreading rumors about someone just because they can, or physical violence, which includes getting beat up, wedgies and swirlies.
Luckily, even though I wouldn’t call it lucky, the worst I ever got when it came to bullying was the vocal kind and it usually was making fun of me for being Jewish.
As I have grown, I have learned to be the bigger person and disregard people’s ignorance and know that if I retaliate then they just get what they want.
Just recently, the sports world has put the spotlight on the Miami Dolphins and their hazing/bullying incident.
Offensive lineman Richie Incognito has been in the spotlight on ESPN and FOX for being accused of bullying and harassing fellow offensive lineman and teammate Jonathan Martin.
It all started when Martin left the team facilities after an incident that had teammates avoiding the lineman at lunch with no one sitting with him.
At first, most people were confused why a big professional player would walk out of a team because his teammates were playing a little joke.
But as we now know, after the NFL did an investigation of the team, Incognito was behind all of it and more evidence came out.
Voice messages were released that had Incognito yelling racial slurs and saying that he will kill his whole family. Incognito later went on to defend those voicemails saying that he didn’t mean to hurt him.
Hey Richie, what do you expect when you tell someone that you’re going to kill their family? A cake? A good laugh? A pay raise? No, you took it too far and are now facing the consequences.
But what I don’t understand about this whole situation is why fellow Dolphins players are defending Incognito.
They are all telling the media that there was no harassing going on with Incognito and Martin and that they were really good friends.
Have they not seen the evidence that is right in front of their faces or are they just as dumb as Incognito?
But I have a theory with this, Incognito is the star guard for the Dolphins and when the team loses a player of that caliber they have to make big changes.
Now let’s look back in the day when the popular kids would pick on one kid because they could or that kid had ugly shoes.
Let’s say one of these popular kids gets in trouble or does something wrong and the unpopular kid is the only one to see it or know the truth.
No matter how much the unpopular kid will say the truth, the popular kid’s friends will make sure that he doesn’t get in trouble.
So if we incorporate that situation into what happened with the Dolphins, there really is no difference between the two.
The starting quarterback and other stars of the team defend the other “popular” kid and try and get the media to believe them.
But the proof is in the pudding and the voicemails and other evidence proves that Incognito is just a big bully and his friends are trying to get him out of trouble.
However, I’m glad that Incognito is finally being outed of who he actually is but I wish Martin would have done it in a different way.
As kids we are told if we get bullied or see someone getting bullied, we should tell a teacher or someone of importance.
But this is how kids’ are supposed to handle things and now as adults we are supposed to either hide it or just let it go.
Especially as guys we aren’t supposed to cry and just be a man and either fight it out or don’t let it bother you.
Most guys have real feelings and it’s hard for us to against the norm and show some emotion, even if it is a little sadness.
Martin is a prime example of what he shouldn’t have done. Instead of running away from his problems, he should have faced them head on and had an actual conversation with the person he was having a problem with.
If this had been done in the first place, right from the get go this would have never blown out like it did.
As men who play sports, we have this idea that, “I’m a tough guy and that I should never show any emotion about any of my feelings because that is what girls are supposed to do.”
I’m sure plenty of people think that if a guy who plays professional football is going out and venting his emotions is just not the right thing to do. Football is meant to be tough and rowdy, not let’s share our feelings time.
Maybe some players like to hold in their emotions and save it for the game, but sometimes too much hate can take a toll on a person and put them over the edge like it almost did with Martin.
As adults we have this great ability to talk to one another and be civil about it, well for the most part.
If you have two somewhat competent adults than you can have a normal conversation and work out your problems.
So, for those other athletes getting bullied and hiding it in, stop it. You are not doing yourself or your team any good. Make sure you talk it out and don’t run away from the problem, because all it will do is chase you no matter where you go.