5. Go to Starbs and get a salted caramel mocha. It’s essentially a hot milkshake that involves espresso, steamed milk, mocha sauce, toffee-nut syrup, whipped cream, caramel drizzle, AND a mixture of turbinado sugar (da fuq?) and sea salt. Subsequent heart attacks worth it.

4. Avoid A&A, because the only thing more shocking than the lighting/carpet color combo is the frigid temp. It feels like you’re in a rusty refrigerator full of hipsters.

3. Lightly jog everywhere.

2. Walk by Ezra Stiles. The building vents across from that Thai place blow out really warm steam. Surprising that there’s vapor-producing machinery inside of bedrock, I know.

1. Buy a snuggie. Why did these ever go out of fashion?! They’re like fanny packs—they’re so functional, yet everyone wants to deem them a “trend”! F that.