Plunging into previously charted waters, “Shark Night 3D” (2011) resembles, at first glance, a hybrid of the classic “Jaws” (1975) and last summer’s shockingly successful “Piranha 3D” (2010). “Jaws” delivered unadulterated fear that made beachgoers everywhere say 10 Hail Marys before wading onto a simple sandbar, whereas “Piranha 3D” embraced its intrinsic ridiculousness and carved out a niche as an excessively blood-soaked spoof/remake of a ’70s B movie.
Unfortunately for audiences, “Shark Night 3D” seems to take itself seriously, but lacks the plausibility and character depth that seduce audiences. For example, a great white with an insatiable hunger for human flesh seems possible in the fictional beachside town of Amity Island (as in “Jaws”), but a flurry of man-eating Jurassic fish in a Louisiana bayou seems like a stretch. In fact, the story line of “Shark Night 3D” is so idiotic that the viewer yearns for the film to self-satirize and employ hyperbolic gore as “Piranha 3D” does.
Furthermore, in “Jaws,” audiences were captivated by Martin Brody’s (Roy Scheider) sense of responsibility for his family and fellow island dwellers and by Sam Quint’s (Robert Shaw) Ahab-like quest to dominate oceanic nature. The average viewer will certainly not experience the same affinity toward the caricatured college kids in “Shark Night 3D.”
“Shark Night 3D” follows a simplistic, hackneyed horror movie formula. The film centers on a group of spirited college students who travel to a friend’s lake house for what promises to be a fun-filled weekend of partying and joy-riding in a speedboat. The characters are all from different walks of life; among them are the archetypal popular girl, the medical student, the offbeat friend, the nerd and the star athlete.
Upon arriving at Lake Pontchartain, an ominous tone develops immediately that the group of friends disregards. Brawny Dennis (Chris Carmack) and his gap-toothed sidekick, Red (Joshua Leonard), begin to agitate the athlete, Malik (Sinqua Walls), at a gas station. The scene almost becomes violent, but beautiful Sara (Sara Paxton), Dennis’ ex-girlfriend, subdues with her sweet, ringing pleas, and the gang forges ahead on their path toward seemingly uninhibited frivolity.
The film continues as advertised: The group frequently overlooks harrowing omens, creating dramatic irony and an obvious contrast between the carefree attitudes of the protagonists and the dangers that lurk underwater. Not until Malik’s arm is savagely gnawed off after an inexplicable wakeboarding accident does the gang actually recognize the perils of its situation. As they are forced to traverse the water to save Malik, the group must enlist the help of their previous tormentors, Dennis and Red, who seem to have slightly too much knowledge about the predatory species hunting the protagonists.
“Shark Night 3D” never definitively establishes its central villain. Whether it’s a terrorist bent on fattening his bank account like Hans in “Die Hard” (1988) or the twisted machine, Agent Smith, who seeks the extinction of the human race in “The Matrix” (1999), good action films usually have one antagonist who embodies evil. “Shark Night 3D,” however, never truly identifies one antihero. Instead, it toys with several sadistic characters and dozens of ravenous sharks. The film would have been better served by one great white terrorizing the central characters and impressing audiences with nightmares of aquatic-themed deaths.
Despite a valiant effort by Donal Logue as a goofy, small-town sheriff, sheriff, no single cast member truly distinguishes himself due to the restrictive script. Paxton remains dreadfully blasé as her supposed friends are picked off one by one by carnivorous fish. She might have been better utilized as a cunning plot ploy, since no audience member expects the gorgeous blonde lead to become shark chum. Her male counterpart, Dustin Milligan (as the pre-med student, Nick), was equally unimpressive, provoking the viewer to feel apathetic towards his attempts to evade his impending, grisly demise.
Yet, the true blame lies on the shoulders of the director, David R. Ellis, whose incompetence as a horror moviemaker is unprecedented — he was responsible for critical flops like “Final Destination 2” (2003) and “The Final Destination” (2009). Ellis never builds enough suspense to terrify viewers, and the killing scenes are dragged out to the point that they become tiresome.
“Shark Night 3D” never understands its own place in Hollywood and, thus, does not deliver the cheap thrills and blood-curdling screams that are characteristic of teen horror masterpieces.