Looking 4 pet

Originally Posted on The Yale Herald - Medium via UWIRE

Craigslist > new haven > for sale > pet — looking for

About Me

My name is Doug, and I want a nice pet. I’m in my late 40s, and I work in HR at an advertising company. Because of my career, I’m a pretty responsible person. I live in a one-story house, and I have a decent backyard for a pet. I don’t travel a lot, either, and I have friendly neighbors. I don’t own any animals, if that’s important. I also have very few allergies, so we should be good. No spouse or kids.

Here are some qualities I would prefer in my pet:

  • Gentle
  • No scratching
  • Makes some noise, but not too loud (neighbors)
  • Not sexual
  • Right around my lower back to the start of my butt
  • More rublike than taplike

This is not a massage. I want a pet. I do not want a massage or oils of any kind.


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